Relationship Therapy

We begin with a structured assessment process designed to give me a full picture of your relationship, and of each of you as individuals. The first session we meet together as a couple. These sessions help me understand your history, what's brought you to therapy, and how your dynamic plays out in the room. Then I meet with each of you individually - typically one session each. This gives each partner space to share things that might be harder to say in front of the other, and gives me a richer sense of who you each are outside of the cycle. We then come back together for our fourth session, where I share my observations and we align on a direction for the work. From there, we usually meet as a couple throughout the rest of our time together.

There's no honest one-size-fits-all answer to this – it depends on how long patterns have been entrenched, what you're navigating, and how ready each of you is to do the work. What I can say is that EFCT is not a brief intervention. Genuine emotional change takes time, and I'd rather be honest with you about that upfront than promise a quick fix. Most couples I work with are in therapy for one to two years at minimum. Progress can feel nonlinear – there will be sessions that feel like breakthroughs and sessions that feel hard. Both are part of the process. I can often see the bigger progress trend even when we have hard sessions.

My couples sessions are 75 minutes – longer than the standard therapy hour. The reason is simple: there are two of you. Two people whose experiences I want to fully hear, two emotional worlds to track, and often a lot of ground to cover. In my experience, 50-minute couples sessions almost always end with a feeling of "we needed more time." Longer sessions allow us to get somewhere meaningful rather than just scratching the surface.

Progress in EFCT rarely looks like "we stopped fighting." It looks more like: the fights feel different. You start to understand what's underneath your own reactions – and your partner's. You find yourselves able to reach toward each other in moments where you used to shut down or escalate. The distance starts to close, not because you've learned techniques, but because something has genuinely shifted between you. Early progress often shows up as feeling less alone in the relationship even before everything feels resolved.

The short answer: no. I don't contract with any insurance companies, and clients pay session fees directly to me. This is intentional and worth explaining.

Most of the work I do with couples falls into what insurance companies consider "self-improvement": increasing relationship satisfaction, improving communication, rebuilding connection after betrayal, working on intimacy. Insurance companies typically only reimburse therapy they consider medically necessary for a diagnosable mental health condition – and that's not what most couples I work with are seeking.

If you do have a diagnosable mental health condition and that is the primary focus of our work, you may request a superbill, but please note that it’s fairly rare for this to be the case.

Both. I see clients in person at my office in Denver, CO, and virtually for clients located anywhere in Colorado or Minnesota.

First, the evidence: EFCT is one of the most rigorously researched approaches to couples therapy in the world, with studies showing not just that it works, but that the results hold over time.

Second, training: couples therapy is a specialized skill, and a lot of therapists offer it with minimal dedicated training. I've invested significantly in my clinical education — including advanced training in EFCT specifically — because I believe you deserve a therapist who has done the work to do this well. You can see my full training background here.

Third, and maybe most importantly: my goal isn't to keep you together at all costs. It's to help you get honest and genuinely connected – with each other, and with yourselves. Sometimes that leads to a renewed and transformed relationship. Sometimes it leads to a clearer, more conscious decision to part. Either way, the work is real, and the goal is your wellbeing, not a particular outcome.

Yes, and honestly, some reluctance is pretty normal. Starting couples therapy can feel vulnerable, scary, or even like an admission of failure. If your partner is willing to show up even hesitantly, that willingness is enough to begin. We don't need both of you to be equally enthusiastic on day one. What matters is that both of you are present and willing to try.

Uncertainty is actually a very honest place to start. I'd rather work with a couple where one partner is ambivalent than one where both are performing certainty they don't feel. Part of what we do early in the work is create space for that ambivalence; to understand what's underneath it, and what it would take for each of you to feel like this is worth investing in.

Sometimes both. Couples therapy addresses the dynamic between you – the cycle, the patterns, the relational wounds. Individual therapy addresses what each of you brings to the relationship from your own history and inner world. These aren't mutually exclusive, and in fact they can complement each other well. If I think individual therapy would serve you better, or if it would help alongside our couples work, I'll say so.

Yes. I work with couples, polycules, and partners in all kinds of relationship configurations. You don't need to fit a particular mold to work with me.

When people ask this question, it's usually because they're scared – scared of what honesty might surface, scared of what they might find out about themselves or their partner, scared that saying things out loud will make them more real. That fear makes complete sense.

Therapy can bring difficult things to the surface that were already there. In that sense, it can feel harder before it feels better. But that's not the same as making things worse – it's the process of getting honest. What I can tell you is that my job is to make that honesty feel safe enough. I will work hard to pace us and create manageable “bite sized pieces” in our work together. That being said, I respect your autonomy to decide if now feels like the right moment to dive deeper.